You Won’t Believe Why People Are Rubbing The Crotch Of This Statue

Apparently Victor Noir, a 19th century French journalist died with a banana in his pocket or he was just happy to see Prince Pierre Bonaparte, the nephew of Napoleon who shot him to death in 1870.

Looks like he somebody was partying a little too hard huffing the spray paint.

That is because people are describing his tomb as “The sexiest tomb in Pere Lachaise” due to the massive budging crotch on his statue. The tomb has become a symbol of fertility with men and women traveling to the famed Pere Lachaise cemetery in Paris… to touch Noir’s bronze trouser trout.

It kind of looks like he messed himself.

While the statue itself wasn’t erected until 20 years after Noir’s death, over the past 125 years a legend has arisen around his manhood. They say that people that give Victor a helping hand, a good polish of his knob, or a gentle jiggle of his jollies, will be blessed with good luck, fertility and romance.  So many folks have given him an over the pants handsy that the crotch of the statue has had all of the green oxidation that covers the rest of the statue has been rubbed off, leaving a gleaming tribute to his little Vic.

Rockin out with his schfanz out.

Other famous residents of the cemetery include Oscar Wilde and rocker Jim Morrison who also receive lots of affection. People even leave joints for The Doors musician; so people really know how to get down in this cemetery! RIP stands for Rockin’ Insane Party.

One lady had to take things too far.

Authorities at the cemetery tried to stop all of the touchy-feely stuff by putting a fence around poor Victor. However this resulted in protests by women who demanded to be allowed to rub his junk to get fertility. Too bad he wasn’t alive to enjoy all the attention being paid to his package, but Victor is in good company. That honor goes to Portuguese soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo who last year helped unveil a statue of himself in his hometown rocking a giant boner.

So remember guys, in your last will and testament make sure to commission a statue for your tomb that outlines very specific, well-endowed dimensions for your crotch.